Straussy: A Statement

August 8, 2012 § Leave a comment

Australians, Englishmen, and cricketlovers! hear me

and be silent, that you may hear: believe me

for my beliefs, and respect my honour, that

you may believe me for my honour, your honour: censor me in your wisdom, and

awake your brains, if you have any, that you may the better judge me, your judge.

I mean your honour.

Sorry…If there’s anyone here, any dear friend of

KP’s, even a single one, to him I say, that Strauss’ love to KP

was no less than his, meaning KPs. If then that friend, if there is one, even one solitary one, demand

why Straussy rose against KP, this is my answer:

–Not that I loved KP more than he loved himself, but that I loved

him less than KP loved himself. Had you rather KP were living than dead?

As KP loved himself, I weep for him; as KP was fortunate in many innings,

I rejoice at it; as KP was media-loving, camera hungry, cliché-making and wanted a slot on the Graham Norton show, well

I honour him:

but, as KP was egotistical, I slew him.

There is tears for his self-love; joy for his

Self-death; honour for his self-pleasure; and death for his ambition.

Who is here is so basic that he would be an Australian?

If any, speak; for him have I offended and he has offended me.

Who is here so rude that would be an Australian? If

There are Aussies here speak; for they have offended me. Who is here so

vile that will love this country? If any, speak;

for I am offended. I pause for a reply.

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